i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
Randomize