After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
You drunk yet?
Nope. Give me two hours then delete my texts before you read them.
Cant make any promises.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
Randomize
