It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
Randomize
