Define "chronic" masturbator.
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
I don't know how this happened but I got an email thanking me for being a Waffle House regular. HOW DO THEY KNOW?? Maybe I need to stop going there shitfaced.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
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