Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
Sacagawea was the original milf.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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