that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
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