I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
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