i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize
