In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
Our 450 pound cab driver smells like McDonalds and sunblock with a touch of vodka. Correction I smell like vodka.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
Randomize
