Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Randomize
