I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize
