She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
