I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize