last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
Randomize
