after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
worst night to have a conscience
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
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