Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
Randomize
