My hair reeks of homosexuality.
My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
