How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
Randomize
