We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
She's just so happy...and so naked.
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
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