It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
I just gave her a sobriety test in the middle of the baking aisle.
And the results, officer?
She's fucked.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
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