woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
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