I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
well you can't waste a boner
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize
