How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
