The maid of honor just puked.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
Randomize
