windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
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