She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Randomize
