I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
At a bar in the city and the whole place starting singing “Happy Birthday” to someone. Everyone but me. The person next to me leaned over and said, “Why didn’t you sing along?!?” I responded, “I don’t know him. I don’t give a shit if he has a happy birthday.”
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
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