this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
