time to smoke my breakfast
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
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