Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
The adults are the big ones right?
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
Randomize
