JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Randomize
