Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
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