Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
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