its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
I need water and some morals
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
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