I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Randomize
