you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
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