Can Purell be used as lube?
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
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