i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
