i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
Todays life lesson brought to you by last nights half pitchers of cheap sangria: you'll never get the stain or the SMELL of sangria vomit out of your bedroom carpet.
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
This is an alert from the drunk police: you have reached the point of no return. Text messages past this point are illegible.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
