You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
Randomize
