It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
Randomize
