Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
Randomize
