Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
Randomize
