Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
Randomize
