why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
Randomize
