That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
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