You were right. It hurts to walk today.
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
Randomize
