I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
I licked your asshole in confidence.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
Randomize
