It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
