I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
